Several FOUR FEATHERS Reviews Float In!!

Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.

I saw this on Monday night, and overall, I’m not terribly inspired to write about it one way or another. It’s handsomely made, but vacant in some ways. I liked some of the film, and some of it I simply sat through. Overall, I don’t feel one way or another enough about it to work up much of a head of steam to write.

Luckily, we’ve got a couple of last looks at the film before you decide if you’re going to head out to catch this one this weekend or not...

Howdy ho, Harry, I was the person who steamed TUCK EVERLASTING and got negated by three positive reviews on it the next day. I would just like to let you know that I didn't think it was BAD, I thought it was AWFUL! It's sloppily made crap. Anyway, I just got back from a screening of FOUR FEATHERS. I want to start off that this certainly is no Oscar bait. Hell, it might not even be ELIZABETH. But it sure is an entertaining, epic film that should please most demographics. Based on the novel, of which I am unfamiliar with, Heath Ledger is HARRY, a British soldier who has recently married to ETHNE (a lovely but absent Kate Hudson). As he is ready to relax with his new wife, he receives news that the British Army is heading to Sudan to fight in a colonial British war. Unfortunately, HARRY is a coward and he decides to rescind his position in the army, much to the surprise of longtime friend JACK (a very good Wes Bentley, in his biggest and best role yet). Very quickly, he is sent four feathers, each a sign of his pathetic cowardice. He becomes miffed, and heads to Sudan for redemption. What ensues is an odd and uncomfortable parallel to the John Walker Lindh saga. By temporarily joining the Sudanese army and growing a mighty beard, losing dozens of pounds in the process, the normally pallid Ledger still doesn't gain the ability to demonstrate ANY new facial expressions, but he looks mighty convicing while his ass is being kicked around hard. Shekar Kapur's second film lacks the electric narrative of ELIZABETH, but while the beginning is shaky and moves a bit too quickly, the middle section features great pacing. The battle scenes especially are quite rousing, and Kapur does the best with a mostly underwritten script. All in all, its a rather rousing flick, aside from the generic African American sidekick, and Ledger's inability to earn a tan in the desert. Shekar Kapur establishes himself as a pretty damn good filmmaker. Next time, they should get him a script that actually exhibits character relationships and doesn't rely on well staged action scenes. I am fabfunk, and I have spoken.

What’s this next spy got to say about it?

Hey Harry, “Going to Four Peaks Brewery” here again – your increasingly reliable spy from the Phoenix/Scottsdale area. I fired off A.I., ADAPTATION, and EMPEROR’S CLUB reviews your way in the past. Here’s another. About two-thirds of the way into the press screening of THE FOUR FEATHERS this evening, three ten-year-old kids walked out and yelled “This movie sucks ass!” and “Goddamn right, it does!” It’s not that nearly that bad, but it isn’t all that good, either. This movie yearns to be something it’s not, and will inevitably (if not already) draw unfair comparisons between LAWRENCE OF ARABIA and other “sand” epics. I think there’s probably a hunger for that sort of movie in this day and age. This movie is to LAWRENCE as the recent MUMMY movies are to the Indiana Jones series. Without recounting the movie scene for scene, know this: Heath Ledger plays a British soldier named Harry who’s engaged to Ethne (Kate Hudson). Harry’s best friend is another soldier named Jack (Wes Bentley), who is drawn as the better, more devoted soldier of the two. Soon enough, their regiment is going to be sent to the Sudan, where a British outpost was wiped out by a band of Arab desert marauders. Harry resigns his post, and is given four feathers representing Harry’s cowardice. Ethne gives Harry the four feather, inspiring him to go to the Sudan by himself, in an effort to follow the Arabs and ultimately warn his friends. The plot isn’t bad, but the movie is slow, turgid, and occasionally hard to follow. It has a problem with space and time too, which I don’t quite understand. We jump to The Sudan when Bentley & co. arrive, then jump back to Harry. Minutes later, we’re back in The Sudan with Harry, and only then does the film decide to give us the sweeping music and “The Sudan” title card. Strange choice. Whatever the case, the movie is riddled with cliches, though judging from the reactions of morons in attendance, we aren’t in danger of losing those anytime soon. By the way, here’s a side note that I’ll throw out there: is it just the Phoenix/Scottsdale area, or has anyone noticed a recent increase of people laughing at things that aren’t supposed to be funny? The scene where Chris Cooper kisses Kevin Spacey, and the one when Annette Bening breaks down in AMERICAN BEAUTY comes to mind. The scene where the kid pulls a gun on Bruce Willis in UNBREAKABLE is another. It happened quite a few times in this movie. Anyway, some of the action is pretty hard to follow, none of the characters are very clearly drawn, and I actually found myself wondering who Heath Ledger was after near the film’s end. Frankly, by that point, I didn’t care. The entire movie hinges on Ledger being deemed a coward, but the movie’s fatal flow is not delineating this very well at all. By no means could anyone consider him to be a coward. If it were the real world and someone did that to me, I’d leave my friends and my fiancee to go fuck themselves. For real. The last thing I would do is travel across the globe to help them out. And even if I did that, I’d demand an apology on the other end. This film just felt lacking on every level, despite impressive sets, costumes, and accents. Kate Hudson is absolutely wasted, and I hope she finds a role like Penny Lane sometime soon. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA was three hours, yet I wished it were five; this one was a little over two, and I wished I’d spent half the time in there. Occasionally good, but it should have been great. It just goes to prove: they really **don’t** make them like they used to. ** ½ stars out of five.

We’ll see what you guys think as you check in here to rant and rave over the weekend if you take a look...

"Moriarty" out.