I am – Hercules!!

I know many were watching “24” and “Carnivale” and “Desperate Housewives” Sunday night at 9 p.m., and so missed one of the funniest hours of unscripted television ever broadcast.

VH1, happily, is rerunning that hourlong episode of "Surreal Life" today and every other day this week.

I don’t care what you thought of previous “Surreal” seasons; this installment will haunt you the rest of your days.

Go-Go Jane Weidlin went skinny-dipping with with stunning 20-year-old “America’s Top Model” winner Adrianne Curry. Both Da Brat and Verne “Mini-Me” Troyer placed annoyed calls to their agents and/or managers.

2’8” Troyer promptly fell in lust with 5’11” Curry and passed out, hammered to the gills on what looked like a mojito. “Brady Bunch” vet Christopher Knight carried the angry drunken dwarf to bed, but Troyer was up and riding his mini-mobile a few hours later, still drunk but now stark naked in some ill-lit corner of the mansion, peeing on live electrical implements.

It only got better from there, as Troyer’s far more sober housemates tried to talk him back to bed.

Fire up that VCR. The episode repeats 11 times over the next six days on VH1.

Looking for bumper stickers, plush toys and girls’ underwear covered with cartoon double-amputees? Visit The Herc Store!